Christmas maybe over, but I still feel very much in the Christmas mood. I was hoping to get some fun gifts over the season, but nothing quite quenched my thirst, not that the gifts I got weren’t incredibly thoughtful and for the most part very useful. Alas, nothing screamed Christmas to me when I opened it, what ever happened to giving a gift that fit into the theme of Christmas? I want to see Christmas colors of red, green and white, see Santa Clause, reindeer or candy cane designs on the gifts I open. I would’ve even appreciated a fun game to play, games aren’t just for kids.
Christmas is a time to splurge and get things that you normally wouldn’t, besides a time to spend with your loved ones. I can buy myself socks, underwear and any other boring piece of clothing, I want something fun and something that reminds me of Christmas. I don’t want to struggle to remember when I got something, I should be able to look at it and say “I got that for Christmas”, instead of struggling to remember just where it came from. I just want to find myself something great to get for an after Christmas gift.
Here are some of the best:
Asshole Repellent
Feel like you’re always attracting jerks? Bring your asshole repellant with you to keep them away.
Remote Controlled Flying F*ck
Fly this ridiculously hilarious remote controlled toy
Handgun Egg Frying Mold
Shape your eggs like a gun. Also works great with pancakes and as a cookie cutter
Offensive Business Cards
Have a message for that guy taking 4 parking spots? Deliver it with these offensive business cards
Perverted Garden Gnome
What’s more fun than a garden gnome? A perverted garden gnome! Will make a good office desk decoration!
$100 Toilet Paper
Buy this one hundred dollar bill 3 Ply Toilet Tissue for extra comfort and that Warren Buffett feel.
Toilet Coffee Mug
Why should dogs be the only ones allowed to drink out of the toilet?
Bacon Flavored Candy Canes
When we told Santa Claus about these Bacon Candy Canes he nearly fell out of his sleigh
Giant Soccer Ball
Play soccer with this giant soccer ball.
Fart Extinguisher
Sick of people with horrible gas? Use this extinguisher to get rid of the smell.
6 Pack Redneck Beer and Soda Can Holster
Hate getting up to get another beer from the fridge? With this beer holster you can hold six of your favorite beverages. A great gift for those that like to indulge.
The Swearing Finger
Feeling shy when it comes to telling someone off? Let the swearing finger do the dirty work for you.
Shot Roulette Drinking Game Set
Pick your poison, give it a spin and let the roulette wheel determine your fate! Awesome party drinking game!
Glow in The Dark Toilet Paper
Now you’ll always be able to find the toilet paper – even in the dark
Spin The Shot machine
Remember Spin the Bottle? Spin the Shot is the same game, except you are playing for shots and there is no kissing involved
Bacon Christmas Tree Ornament
Deck the halls with boughs of bacon? Cover your tree in your favorite food and keep yourself constantly salivating.
Automatic Rotating Laser Pet Toy
Place DART on the floor, turn it on and watch the chase begin! Variable speeds and timer settings offer 16 exciting play combinations.
Finger Food Plates
Ever been at a party and wondered how you’ll balance you wine glass, hors d’oeuvres and scintillating conversation all at the same time?
Weener Kleener Soap
Perfect gift for the Valentines day, just make sure he does not get aroused while while using this soap!
