Christmas maybe over, but I still feel very much in the Christmas mood. I was hoping to get some fun gifts over the season, but nothing quite quenched my thirst, not that the gifts I got weren’t incredibly thoughtful and for the most part very useful. Alas, nothing screamed Christmas to me when I opened it, what ever happened to giving a gift that fit into the theme of Christmas? I want to see Christmas colors of red, green and white, see Santa Clause, reindeer or candy cane designs on the gifts I open. I would’ve even appreciated a fun game to play, games aren’t just for kids.
Christmas is a time to splurge and get things that you normally wouldn’t, besides a time to spend with your loved ones. I can buy myself socks, underwear and any other boring piece of clothing, I want something fun and something that reminds me of Christmas. I don’t want to struggle to remember when I got something, I should be able to look at it and say “I got that for Christmas”, instead of struggling to remember just where it came from. I just want to find myself something great to get for an after Christmas gift.
Here are some of the best:
Ugly Christmas Sweater Kit
The original sweater that Santa used to wear back when he was pimping for a living.
Plug Mug
Stop others from ever being able to use your mug
Over the Hill Walker
Know someone who’s feeling insecure about turning one year older? Look no further for the perfect birthday gift. Makes people feel that much worse about their upcoming birthday.
Maybe You Touched Your Genitals Hand Sanitizer
Ever wonder where that persons hands were right before they shook hands with you? Why not offer them a squirt of your maybe you touched your genitals hand sanitizer, just to be safe.
The Official Bullshit Button
This straight-talking Bullshit Button allows you to call bullshit whenever you see it! Simply press the red buzzer to make it light up, buzz loudly and announce, That was bullshit!
Glow in The Dark Toilet Paper
Now you’ll always be able to find the toilet paper – even in the dark
Functional Desktop Mini Cannon
The mini cannon to end all mini cannons! These precision machined mini cannons will look great on any mantle or on a desk
Fake Poop Shaped Soap
Want to give guests a frightening sight when they go to wash their hands? This soap is the ideal way of doing that.
Envelope X-Ray Spray
Are you constantly holding envelopes up to the light to see if you can catch a glimpse inside? This spray will help you pry through peoples mail easier.
Middle Finger Socks
With these socks you don’t need your finger to flip people off.
Baby Shark Costume
Dress your baby as a scary but adorable shark
Bacon Bandaids
Ouch! Treat your minor cuts, scrapes and scratches with the incredible healing power of tasty bacon!
The Gun Mug
Know someone who would kill for a coffee? Someone who loves guns and loves coffee? Look no further, this is a perfect gift!
The Butt Office Supply Holder
Wanna give someone in your office a little something? Then look no further! This desk accessory holds pens, tape, and paper clips and does it in an interesting way.
How to Traumatize Your Children
Have you ever wondered how kids come out so messed up? Wonder no longer! This guide book will teach you all the necessary skills to *uck up your children.
Magical Unicorn Mask
Vaguely disturbing but awesome at the same time. If you love attention, then you will love this mask.
Underwear Gloves
Are you really naked under those gloves? For Pete’s sake, put on some Handerpants!
YouTube Video Shower Curtain
Pretend that you are online and show off all your talent! Make your own famous meme on each showered and surprise your imaginary audience.
Magic Wand TV Remote Control
This Harry Potter style magic wand can replace your TV remote and make you feel like a real wizard. Dumbledore would be proud.
